January 2003 Newsletter

LISTENING THE GOLD MEDAL FOR SUCCESS

Why Does Listening Matter?
   It is important because - you live by yourself but you cannot do it alone.
      God made us incomplete. We need other people.
         Understanding others helps us understand our self better.

What gets in the way of effective listening?
   Not having a listening heart - with pure intent - karate's beginner's mind.
      A person must want to listen.
         A tendency to listen to our inner voice instead of the person that we are meeting.
            Wanting to hear what we want to hear, rather than what the person says.

Several seminars I have attended during the past few years have involved the art of Listening. In each seminar the presenters, the best being Steve Shapiro and Bob Proctor, state that HEARING is a physical process but LISTENING is wanting to hear. Listening is the second most important thing we do, next to breathing and it is the forerunner to LEARNING. Listening, which will make a difference in our lives and in the world, is: a Skill; a State of Mind; a State of Heart; an Attitude; an Art; and a Path to Enlightenment. At each level of physical, emotional and social development, listening is emotional and it is mental. Listening at a high rate must be practiced. It is a choice, an attitude, where people must decide that the want to hear. When with other people, we have a choice to listen to the other person or the voice inside our head. We listen to feelings with an intuitive factor of being. When doing so, we can sense the excitement, interest, emotion, and pain being transmitted. The quality of our lives is determined by the quality of our relationships. You cannot learn about another person's beliefs and dreams, if you are talking.

A key to success in school, karate and life finds listening to become a State of heart because it is so much more than just hearing. At the highest level of listening, we use our eyes, our intuition, our emotions, our ears, our mind and our senses. It is an opening of our emotions, where we listen for the intent more than the content of what is said. It is more than the facts. Who is the person? Where is he or she coming from? Listen to and not about the individual - creates the connection between people.

If my State of Heart is the desire to just make money or promote my ego - my chance to reach other people is greatly reduced. If I intend to help other people, the rate of success is increased.
   King Solomon said, "Give me the gift of a listening heart."
      Aristotle said, "Wisdom is reward we get for a lifetime of listening when we would rather to have been talking."
         Paths to enlightenment - Meditation and Prayer - require listening to the voice inside ourselves.
            Relationships need this enlightenment to grow and flourish.
               Listening is the polishing stone not the grinding stone in life.

Listening is a process - - people are involved in our lives, physically, emotionally, psychologically - - What do we listen for?

• Recognize people for whom & what they are and their beliefs.

• We cannot change people - accept them for what they are.

• People are interested in themselves.

• What is important to you?

• How do you want your life to become?

• How can I help you?

• Ask questions AND listen.

• Are they a victim or creator - have they taken responsibility for their lives?

• Listen for those to whom You want to Give the Gift From Under the Tree

LISTENING IS LIKE THE BOX UNDER THE TREE - - THE MOST BEAUTIFULLY DECORATED PRESENT, THAT IS UNOPENED ALTHOUGH EVERYONE KNOWS ABOUT THE GIFT WHICH CONTAINS THE MOST VALUABLE AND PRECIOUS GIFT THAT CAN BE GIVEN - FEW HAVE GIVEN OR RECEIVED THE GIFT OF LISTENING.

When making personal decisions, listen to what your head says; then listen to what your heart says. If they differ, follow your heart! Whenever you listen to your heart, you listen to that part of you that is most interested in your well-being.

As we begin the new year, reflect upon what others want. Start today to help someone become more than what he or she is today. Set personal goals to live your life, to help others, and you will do more than just help yourself. Listen to our world leaders. Reflect upon what is being said and understand if there is listening occurring. What kind of world do you want your children to inherit in the next century?

Accept MY challenge to set realistic short and long term goals. Set specific goals with a desired time for completion. State what you will do daily to help achieve the goals set. Be prepared to work toward the goals and make consistent step by step improvements toward your success. To succeed, write the goals on a piece of paper or a note card that you will revisit daily.

"Remind thyself, in the darkest moments, that every failure is only a step toward success, every detection of what is false directs you toward what is true, every trial exhausts some tempting form of error, and every adversity will only hide, for a time, your path to peace and fulfillment." Og Mandino

Exercise Vs. Aging 5Pillars.com

No one likes to think about growing old, and with good reason. As we age, we begin losing flexibility, strength and cardiovascular fitness. Bone density decreases, and balance, coordination, vision, hearing, and memory diminish. Conditions such as high blood pressure, coronary heart disease, diabetes, arthritis, and obesity also significantly increase as we get older. As our ability to function decreases, we eventually also lose our independence.

Each year, starting at age 20, sedentary individuals lose 1% of their cardiovascular fitness. By age 35, the average person loses 1/4 to 1/3 pound of lean muscle tissue each year. This gradual loss of muscle results in a 5% reduction in metabolic rate for every decade of life.

Several factors determine the rate at which each of us age. Some of these cannot be controlled, such as your genetic makeup. Environmental factors and stress levels also influence aging, and are to a certain degree controllable. Nutrition and exercise greatly influence how well you age, and are totally in your control. Because there are few symptoms of the aging process, we often take our health for granted, paying little attention to the significance of diet and exercise. We mistakenly associate the absence of disease with the assumption of good health. The truth is that good health does not just happen. It is something that must be maintained on a daily basis, requiring a commitment to physical activity, healthy eating and other health-promoting behaviors.

Currently, there are more than 31 million people in the United States who are 65 and older. The Census Bureau estimates this figure will double by the year 2025. The average life expectancy in this country for men is 72 years, for women it is 79 years. However, the maximum attainable lifespan for humans is believed to be at least 120 years. Sadly, in this country, nearly 92% of those 65 and older do not engage in sufficient physical activity to reap the dozens of benefits that exercise has to offer. Those who do exercise at recommended levels tend to favor aerobic activity such as walking, biking, etc. over strength training. Though aerobic activity is necessary for improving your cardiovascular system and has its place in a well-rounded fitness program, it does very little to preserve muscle strength and bone density.

For those of you who have not made exercise a part of your life, the good news is that it is never too late to begin working out. When researchers looked at individuals who had reached the age of 100 with no major health problems, virtually every one of them reported engaging in regular physical activity. Study after study has shown that you can begin reversing the aging process no matter how old you are, or how inactive you may have been in the past.

Scientists and specialists on aging have long been studying the effects of strength training on the elderly. One study at Tufts University put previously untrained individuals in their 90's who had no underlying medical conditions through an intensive weight-lifting program. When results were measured, it was found that lifting weights had increased muscle function by 200 to 300%! THERE ARE MANY MORE STUDIES COMPLETED AND EVEN MORE CURRENTLY BEING CONDUCTED.

It is never too late to begin to live a healthier life. As the cumulative effects of physical activity, or lack of it, are understood, we all would choose to make exercise a regular part of our lives.